Big changes to our lives and our behaviors often happen as a result of many, many small choices.  Beth Moore, author of Breaking Free, puts it this way: “You’ll never reach your milestones if you can’t manage your moments.”  Our habits and even our health is a cumulative result of these many small choices each day.  There are a multitude of reasons why change can be so difficult.   First of all, change takes courage.  You have to have  courage to face the negative self-talk that might tell you that you have lost weight before just to gain it all back—why would this be any different.  You have to have the courage to be different—the only one at the birthday party not having cake.  You have to have the courage to move out of your comfort zone and think of yourself differently—as a healthy, fit person.  Another fact that makes change difficult is that the world doesn’t change when you have bariatric surgery.  Food is still a big part of almost every social situation.  You’re still just a short distance from your favorite fast food.  Your co-workers still bring in donuts every Friday.  It still takes a lot of effort to engage in regular exercise.  Some people are still unkind.  Life still has many difficulties.  Change can be difficult if you are not sold on the benefits of making the change.  For example, you may not think that it makes a difference if you reach your protein goal/take your vitamin and mineral supplements/exercise or not most days.  If the benefit isn’t clearly etched in your mind, it is unlikely that you will make the effort to change your behaviors.  Change takes effort--lots and lots of effort in the beginning.  As time goes on, old behavior patterns can be broken and replaced by new ones.  Neuro-pathways in your brain actually change over time, making the new behavior more likely to occur.  So practice, practice, practice is needed in the beginning and eventually the new behavior will be automatic.    So how do you make positive changes in your life?   List the benefits.  You need to know that the results are worth the effort.  List the obvious benefits of improved health, ease of movement, ability to participate in desired activities and improved self-esteem.  Then look a little deeper to how your new life will affect those around you—your spouse and children.  It is very common for the entire family to improve their health when one member has bariatric surgery.  The cycle of obesity can be broken.  You will be a role model—leaving a legacy of health, fitness, and empowerment.    Be willing to give food its rightful place.  We have idolized food—giving it a much higher status than it deserves.  Food is essential to nourish our bodies.  Not that food should not be enjoyable, but it makes a poor friend, comforter, entertainer, and boredom fighter.  Work hard to shift the focus away from food during the holidays and celebrations.  Find new traditions that bring deeper meaning to these occasions.  Be specific about what your goals are.  Are you going to walk for 30 minutes five days a week, avoid foods and beverages with more than 2 grams of added sugar, meet your protein goal daily, pack your lunch and snacks the evening before, or all of these?  You need to know what you are shooting for—the little steps that are going to lead to a lifestyle that supports a healthy weight.  Visualize the results.  Put the image of a healthy, fit, energetic, confident you in the front of your mind.  Visualize yourself confidently walking onto a plane and easily buckling the seatbelt, having the time of your life at the amusement park, running a marathon, trying on a size 10 and having it fit, or playing with your children/grandchildren in the yard.   What is your vision for your future?  Change your thoughts.  Negative self-talk can derail the most enthusiastic person.  Find a new mantra and when you hear a negative thought creeping into your mind, replace it right away with something like, “I can do this!”  Manage your moments.  As you come to one of your moments (choosing chips or cottage cheese/choosing exercise or TV/choosing to walk by the candy dish or not) throughout the day—in that space between the choice and the decision—put the image that you have created or the positive mantra in the forefront in your mind.  Each of these little steps takes you closer to your goal.  Get support.  A community of likeminded people will encourage you, inspire you and help you through the tough times.  Online support through the Barix Connection message boards, family and friends, and Barix Clinics support groups can make a world of difference.  You are not in this alone.  Many others have faced the same giants and have overcome them—connect with those people and support each other.  Plan, plan and plan some more.  Take the time to plan meals and snacks in advance.  Add up the protein ahead of time to be sure you will meet your goal.  Pack a lunch/snack bag the night before.  Plan exercise into your daily routine.  Plan for celebrations—can you shift the emphasis from food?  Plan for sugar free treats occasionally.  Plan for travel and trips.  Celebrate and reward.  Be sure to celebrate each of your successes.  It might be simply saying “Yes!” to yourself as you manage a moment, new workout clothing after a week of meeting exercise goals, eating meals on china, a new hairstyle, a planned trip, or taking a class that you have always wanted.    Appreciate and reward yourself for all of your hard work—you are worth it.    They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself.      --Andy Warhol Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.     --Carol Burnett We all have big changes in our lives that are more or less a second chance.     --Harrison Ford