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My Life Before Bariatric Surgery
My busy life in the office, business lunches, and decreasing activity level
allowed me to put on several pounds per year-the problem was that I had
a larger frame, so I could fool myself - until I just got to the point
where I couldn't even run a few yards without feeling winded - couldn't
play tennis, couldn't get up off the couch without an effort - so I had
just resigned myself to being this big person with which I was very unhappy.
My clothes always seemed tight, my dress clothes never looked right, I
was miserable.
The worst part was that I had a young daughter and I had trouble just managing myself, let alone trying to think about being the dad I was for our older 4 children; playing with her at the park when she got older intimidated me. My friends wouldn't say anything to me - in fact, they were very comfortable with me being the big happy guy. I hated it, but just took it because I thought there was nothing that I could do, and they seemed alright with it, so how bad could it be, right?
Not good, and nothing but the potential to spin out of control. The more weight I would put on, the less difference those few pounds made. I had, along the way up the scale, had little successes by losing 5 or 10 pounds, then would put that weight on, plus a couple of extra pounds, and I felt like I had no control over my weight, and now my life, as I knew how dangerous it was to carry all of that extra weight. I could fool or lie to myself . . . and then would comfort myself with food. Sound
familiar???
Making the Decision
I started reading about people who had this surgery, but really did NOT believe that I
deserved to lose weight if I couldn't do it on my own; if I wasn't disciplined enough to lose the weight myself, how could some surgery help me? Additionally, I was very much against any cosmetic
surgery, and was also very intimidated by medical "anything." Doctors represented something gone wrong
to me only; they did not represent the opportunity to change my life for the better.
I dismissed the entire notion until my wife, Cheri, started to read a little more in depth
about the process. She knew exactly how miserable I was, and I was not the same person she had married
some 20 years ago. She explained how it changes your eating habits as well and was not just a temporary cure, and encouraged me to at LEAST investigate with a certain level of sincerity.
I made the appointment with Barix Clinics and met with Dr. Schlesinger to find out about
how I fit into the picture specifically. I decided to proceed and went through the approval process, scared and hopeful at the same time. I was not sure if I wanted to be approved, but I
knew that I really HAD to do something deep in my heart. I couldn't go on being miserable with the "Big
Guy." I was not a big guy.
I have had such a total life change - I am able to exercise - I ride bike, jog/run, walk, play tennis, and
am just more active all of the time. I run up the stairs, and Cheri appreciates having her original hubby back - in fact,
I am in the best shape of my life right now.
My professional careers have improved drastically - I am not sure if it's my confidence in how I look, others'
impressions (especially first impressions), or the combination. I would imagine that it's some of both.
I have coached the women's tennis team for the local high school, ran a half marathon (am planning on a full!),
and my endurance for daily activities is incredible. This includes full days of work THEN going to play at night with my band
or regular solo engagements around the Midwest. I ride bike to the grocery store for small items, instead of hopping in the
car . . . I take every opportunity to move that I can. I feel like a cavemen with teeth! (OK, I'm also weird).
What Would You Like To Share With Others
This is THE most important point I can make - DON'T expect the surgery to do it all for
you! Use the surgery to get to the point where you can exercise regularly, then dedicate
yourself to getting and KEEPING yourself moving and in shape. I have seen people who have put back on
the weight because they expect the surgery to be the answer. It's not. It's only the beginning to an opportunity to change permanently - by the way, a very rewarding change. There is nothing
like the feeling of regularly contributing toward your own goals, regardless of the goals, and this is
NO different.
I don't lift weights or go to the gym - when you can't get there, you have an excuse!
Don't use that excuse. Use gravity and the floor!!! Just do pushups, sit ups, and your favorite of the
aforementioned activities or whatever you would choose. Walk! Run! Do anything!!Enjoy
it!
I have nightmares, less frequently as I distance myself in time from the surgery (August,
2002), that I have put back on all of the weight, and aside from the "something has happened to my child"
nightmares that parents might occasionally have, this is the WORST nightmare for me. I have
gone through so much to get to the point where I can take control of my life that having this taken away
seems like Dante has a post right in my living room! The avoidance of the bad in tandem
with positive feelings of exercise and feeling good about yourself is something that everyone should use
as part of their mindset going in to the process. I have relied upon the positive
aspects much more often, but once in a while that scare can serve to motivate. Yikes! This is a big investment
to throw away!
EXPECT that it will be difficult at times, and EXPECT that the rewards will far outweigh
the difficulties you might face. I also enjoy any and all foods that I enjoyed before the surgery. The
difference is only in the portion sizes, but I seem to eat all of the time! I just
plan on burning it off with exercise, and don't worry about it.
My family has also adopted this approach and have all slowly trimmed down since my surgery.
(Sometimes they HATE when I preach, but they know I love them! Dah!)
When you fit into those small jeans again, can hug your wife close again, can chase your
child around the park again, or even do any of these for the very first time, you will be SOOOOOOO glad
that you committed yourself to a new way of living. This may start with the decision
for surgery, but it is lived and maintained by only one person: YOU!
Congratulations!!! It's really you in that mirror!!!
My Biggest Motivator!
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